Retirement is a great thing especially when you have funny retirement quotes to bring a smile to the retiree's face. We have compiled a collection of quotes that will do just that!
They could be used in a card or letter to send as part of your congratulations to the new retiree. Also bring a smile to the new retiree's face with these
funny retirement poems
No more tests to mark, no more recess breaks, no more loud remarks, no more putting on the brakes.
Tom S. Gold, No More
- Retirement Poems For A Teacher
Retirement is the beginning of an endless summer full of smiles and laughter!
C. A. Lynch
Looking forward to retirement at sixty and sixty-five,
Seventy through to 90, blessed to still be alive.
Julie Hebert
Retirement: the only time you can finally master the art of napping without guilt or judgment
Retirement is the time when you never do all
the things you intended to do when you were still working.
Author Unknown
- Retirement Wishes
When you retire, you switch bosses - from
the one who hired you to the one who married you.
Gene Perret
Retirement is waking up in the morning with nothing to do and by bedtime having done only half of it.
Author Unknown
Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty.....But everything else starts
to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
Phyllis Diller
May your retirement days be a reality of the days that you once only dreamed of.
B. Clements
Now that I'm retired, my favorite exercise is going from 'Couch' to 'Fridge' and back again.
In your retirement years never drink coffee at lunch; it will keep
you awake in the afternoon.
Author Unknown
- Cheers To Retirement
Who would think a challenge in retirement you would see....you no longer have the challenge of what do I wear,
you don't even have to smile, you can be a bear.
C. A. Lynch, A Challenge In Retirement?
- Retirement Challenges
No more hard times, only good times face you as you hit the golf course.
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the
income.
Chi Chi Rodriguez
Retirement is what we all work our lives to get to!
Julie Hebert
May you travel to new destinations, with freedom in your hair.
Julie Hebert
- Your New Life Begins
In retirement, I look for days off from my days off.
Mason Cooley
In retirement, I've discovered the secret to a happy life: it involves less traffic and more pajamas.
Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn
to get along with less cheese.
Gene Perret
- Now Is The Time Poem
The worst thing about retirement is having to drink coffee on your own time.
Author Unknown
- Retirement Again
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy
it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.
Jonathan Clements
Indulge in hobbies, explore new lands, just remember, napping is always in demand!
- Retirement Verses For Cards
Retirement is a celebration where Monday mornings and alarm clocks are kicked to the curb,
and lazy Sundays become a full-time gig. Every day is a cause for celebration!
C. A. Lynch
Celebration Poems
Retiring from nursing may mean the end of the shift, but it doesn't have to be the end of the laughter!
C. A. Lynch
- Retirement Poems For Nurses
Retirement: where you trade in your time clock for a sundial and realize it's always 'happy hour' somewhere!
Retirement can be a fun time and sometimes only quotes said by other people can help spread that cheer. Feel free to use these quotes in your planning and preparation process. We hope you have found these quotes to be somewhat comical as we did. Retirement is definitely not a joke, but like everything else in life, there are funny moments about it. We hope you are laughing on your retirement and making the most of a great situation.