4 Funny Retirement Poems

Share these funny retirement poems with the new retiree. They will bring a smile to their face and hopefully they will relate to the feelings the poems convey. The majority of people are happy to retire, but those of us who have not reached that magical age are often jealous, joking with the retiree is lots of fun. e

Best WishesÂ Â |Â Â Retirement PoemsÂ Â |Â Â Funny Retirement Poems - related: Funny Retirement Quotes

Challenges Of Retirement
Poet: Julie Hebert

Retirement is like becoming a new mother,
Without the hassles and challenges of raising a child
You feel like you’ve been thrown into a different life,
Far from what is familiar and wild.

Don’t worry if times feel strange at first,
You’ll soon find your way.
A little soul searching is all you need,
Then you’ll certainly be more than okay.

Think about all the things you have done,
And the things you would like to.
This is the time to try new things,
See if you're more talented than you knew.

Also, take the time to reconnect,
With friends and family who drifted.
Life has a way of pulling people apart,
Your life can now be shifted.

Let retirement be a little wild,
Go with the flow.
Allow yourself to go as fast as you want,
And be okay with it going slow.

Calling It A Day
Poet: C. A. Lynch

We can't believe you're calling it a day
Stepping down and stepping away
We figured we have to carry you out of here
You're like a fixture, even if you are a dear.

Retiring you're finally doing it
Maybe you will come back in a bit
What will you do all day, who will you tease
We guess you will do just what you please.

Who is going to make us laugh and sing
And what about coffee, who will bring?
We don't know what we will do without you
Oh yes, we will do your work, that's true.

All joking aside, Congrats on your retirement
But calm down, don't show us your excitement!
Happy days ahead are in store for you
Doing what you want to do!

Going To Miss
Poet: Tom S. Gold

We know you are going to miss the alarm clock
And all the juicy office talk.
Missed deadlines you will no longer have to worry
No longer will you have to hurry.

We can't believe you are leaving us today
You don't have to retire cause your gray.
And a wrinkle here and there
We will let you stay, we don't care.

What? You want to retire, oh why
You don't have to retire, you don't have to comply.
You could stay and work all day
What? You want time to play!

Okay, okay, then retire this day
We loved working with you in every way
Let us know how retirement goes
We will let you retire, we suppose!

Counting Down The Days
Poet: C. A. Lynch

You have been counting day this day for years
You have driven us crazy, brought us to tears
If we hear one more time how many day
You may not live to retire in any way.

You have dreamed about this day when
You can throw in the towel and the pen
No more work, no more boss
What will you do, you will be at a loss.

Your answer has always been
That you will do nothing, not lift a pen
Maybe you could farm and raise a few hens
Or go and visit a few cousins.

Well the dreaming is over, retirement is here
With it, we will not interfere
Have fun doing nothing all day
Hey, we love you in every way.

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