Poet: C. A. Lynch
Santa Claus is coming to town,
With his malnourished reindeer wearing a frown,
He slipped on the icy ground,
And twirled around like a silly clown.
In his sleigh, filled with toys,
Santa's getting lost and making too much noise,
He took a wrong turn at the North Pole,
Ended up at a penguin's fishing hole.
Oh, Santa, you're quite a sight,
Trying to squeeze down the chimney, oh so tight,
His belly jiggles like a bowl full of jelly,
Making his escape a little bit smelly.
Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas to all,
Santa's adventures, he will recall,
Though he may stumble and even fall,
He'll always bring joy to one and all.
Poet: C. A. Lynch
In the hustle of the holidays, may your wishes take flight,
Less stress, more joy, in this festive night.
Dream of peace and quiet, though chaos may reign,
May laughter drown out any hint of strain.
More Christmas poems to share:
Christmas Day Poems
Merry Christmas Poems
Poet: C. A. Lynch
'Twas the night of feasting, at the holiday table we sat,
With plates piled high, and stomachs ready for combat.
Christmas cookies galore, tempting us with their charms,
We indulged in one too many, oh the weight in our arms.
Eggnog flowed freely, its merry sweetness did intoxicate,
But one too many sips left us stumbling in a sorry state.
Tummies stretched to the max, like plump round jolly elves,
Oh, what consequences we face from our gluttonous selves!
In the morning we'll emerge weary and bloated yet glad,
Ready to embark on a New Year's resolution - no more holiday shad.
But for now, let us revel in this feast gone astray
In the twinkle of lights, and the warmth of embrace,
Here's to memories made in this festive space.
Poet: C. A. Lynch
Oh no, reindeer on strike, what a sight to behold,
Tired of carrots that taste like mold.
They've picketed the North Pole, causing quite a fuss,
Demanding better veggies, and they won't budge!
Dasher and Dancer hold signs up high,
Complaining about carrots that make them cry.
Prancer and Vixen, standing strong and bold,
Wishing for carrots more precious than gold.
Donner and Blitzen, oh, what a sight,
Protesting carrots that taste so light.
They want flavors that dance on their tongues,
Carrots that make their taste buds rung!
Santa Claus pleads, "Please, my dears,
I promise to search far and near!
I'll find the finest carrots, oh so divine,
For my reindeer who work so hard in line!"
The reindeer pause, then give a cheer,
Santa's promise soothing their strike fear.
They'll get their carrots, sweet and grand,
No more picketing, not even a demand.
So, dear children, don't you fret,
Santa's reindeer will soon be set.
But remember, next Christmas night,
Leave out the best carrots, crunchy and bright!
Poet: C. A. Lynch
In the chaos of the mall, last-minute shopping despair,
Aisle by aisle, tangled in tinsel, pulling out my hair.
The perfect gift's elusive, like a snowflake on the run,
In this festive frenzy, my patience comes undone.
Awkward presents abound, like a gift-giving gaffe,
A sweater three sizes too small, the epitome of a laugh.
But in the wrapping paper tangle, with a chuckle, we persist,
For in these comical moments, it's the thought that tops the list!
More poems about Christmas:
Santa Claus Poems
Christmas Magic Poems
Poet: C. A. Lynch
Santa was jolly, round, and cheery,
But his belt made him a little weary.
One Christmas morning, in a twist of fate,
Santa's belt broke and met its sad fate.
With his pants falling, Santa worried so,
How on Earth would he make his deliveries go?
He wiggled and jiggled, trying to keep them high,
But his pants kept sagging, oh my, oh my!
He tried a rope, tied with a knot,
But that only made him waddle and look like an ox.
He looked for a solution, a makeshift fix,
As his pants kept sinking, down to the bricks.
Then came an idea, a stroke of genius,
Santa's suspenders, a fashion feat unlike the previous!
He strapped them tight, with a chuckle and a wink,
Now Santa's pants would never sink!
So remember this tale of Santa and his plight,
Instead of a belt, he now wears suspenders so tight.
His pants stay up, as he travels with cheer,
Delivering presents to all, year after year!
Poet: C. A. Lynch
In December's cold embrace, a tale unfolds,
Of Santa in flip-flops, trading boots for soles.
Elves crafting snowmen from sunscreen and sand,
In this tropical twist, Christmas takes a stand.
Presents wrapped in tinsel, like a glittering cascade,
Reindeer singing carols, in a joyful parade.
Oh, the holiday cheer, a whimsical delight,
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good laugh tonight!
Poet: C. A. Lynch
Amidst the tinsel and twinkling lights so bright,
Wishing you a Christmas filled with laughter and delight.
May the fruitcake be edible, the sweaters not too tacky,
Merry Christmas to you, a celebration so wacky!
More funny words for the season:
Funny Christmas Wishes
Funny New Year Poems
Poet: C. A. Lynch
As Santa preps his sleigh with gifts galore,
Hoping he finds your chimney, and not the neighbor's door.
May your wishes be wrapped in ribbons and cheer,
Merry Christmas, here's hoping for a Santa visit that's near!
Poet: C. A. Lynch
Once upon a Christmas night, Santa tried to steer his sleigh,
But his navigation had gone horribly astray.
He bumped into clouds and went every which way,
All thanks to that pesky misty display!
The presents, a jumbled heap in the back,
The reindeer tangled in a holiday attack.
Santa knew he had to get back on track,
Or else Christmas Day would be headed for a wacky smack!
Butch, the elf with the super-smart brain,
Came to the rescue, to free Santa's pain.
He used his magic candy cane,
To clear the smog and save Santa from going insane!
With a whoosh and a whiz, the mist was no more,
Santa's sleigh soared high, better than before.
He giggled and laughed, filled with joy galore,
And merrily continued his route to each door.
So, remember this tale of Santa's foggy plight,
When Christmas Eve envelops the night.
If you see a smog-filled haze with no light,
Just know that Santa will be all right!
Poet: C. A. Lynch
In Christmas skies so bright and blue,
Heaven's joy comes down to you.
Angels laugh, and Santa's near,
No coal in stockings, just festive cheer.
Snowflakes dance, a heavenly waltz,
Tunes of joy, celestial exalts.
Gifts aplenty, on clouds they land,
In heaven's warmth, by God's own hand.
So, in this space beyond the clouds,
Christmas laughter freely shrouds.
May heavenly merriment be your part,
A jolly Christmas from the start!
