9 Funny New Year Poems

1. I'll Be A Memory Champ

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   This year, my resolution is truly insane,
   To become a world-renowned memory champ, I proclaim!
   I'll memorize every word in the dictionary,
   From A to Z, it'll be legendary.
   
   But as I flip through the pages, my mind goes blank,
   Words become jumbled, it's like a bad prank.
   I can't even remember what I had for breakfast,
   Let alone the meanings of words so complex.
   
   I try mnemonic techniques, but they fail,
   The words slip away, like a snail.
   My memory is a sieve, nothing sticks,
   This resolution is definitely sick.
   
   So, here's to my ridiculously crazy aim,
   To be a memory champ, what a shame!
   But as I forget and stumble along the way,
   I'll embrace the laughter and enjoy the day.





2. In The New Year

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   In the new year, I promised to clean my house,
   And keep it spick and span,
   But with each passing day,
   It felt like a losing plan.





3. New Year, New Laughs, Same Old Me!

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   The New Year’s here, it’s time to cheer,
   But I’ve already lost my workout gear!
   I’ll start fresh, a brand new goal,
   But first, let’s nap and let the year unfold!
   
   The calendar’s ready, the plans are grand,
   But I’ll be lucky if I stick to a stand!
   Let’s laugh and enjoy, and take it slow,
   After all, it’s the journey that helps us grow!





4. Snooze Button

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   You vowed to wake up early,
   And be productive each day,
   But hitting the snooze button,
   Is your preferred way to stay.





5. New Year's Resolution

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   New Year's Resolutions, oh how we make them strong,
   But with lack of dedication, they don't last very long.
   "I'll hit the gym every day," we boldly declare,
   But by February, we're back to our sedentary lair.
   
   "I'll be more organized," we promise with a grin,
   Yet our desk remains cluttered, buried deep within.
   We buy calendars and planners, and swear we'll use each page,
   But alas, our commitment fades, and it's all just a rage.
   
   "I'll eat healthy, no more junk food," we boldly proclaim,
   But when temptation strikes, our willpower is to blame.
   We find ourselves munching on chips and ice cream,
   Wondering where it all went wrong, feeling like a bad dream.
   
   "I'll quit procrastinating, be productive each day,"
   We convince ourselves, as the clock ticks away.
   But the days turn into weeks, and the weeks into months,
   As we succumb to distractions and forget our true hunts.
   
   Oh, funny New Year's resolutions, full of hope and cheer,
   But without dedication, they vanish like smoke in the air.
   So let's learn from our failures and strive for true action,
   For resolutions worth pursuing, and not mere abstraction.




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More poems about New Year:

Christian Poems for the New Year

New Year Wishes

New Year Quotes



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6. I Will

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   As you write your New Year's resolutions, a list so grand,
   But without perseverance, they slip through your hand.
   "I'll learn a new language," you exclaim with delight,
   But three phrases in, you give up the fight.
   
   "I'll save more money," you pledge with a sigh,
   But the sales and temptations make it all go awry.
   Your bank account dwindles, and your resolve is weak,
   As you swipe your credit cards, feeling like a freak.
   
   "I'll be kinder to others," you vow with a smile,
   But impatience and frustration block it's worthwhile.
   You snap and you snark, forgetting your goal,
   In the heat of the moment, losing self-control.
   
   "I'll travel the world, explore new places," you dream,
   But your passport remains empty, gathering dust it seems.
   The comfort of home beckons you close,
   And your adventurous spirit, quickly slows.
   
   Oh, New Year's resolutions, with potential so bright,
   But without perseverance, they fade into the night.
   So hold onto your dreams and fight for what's right,
   In dedication and action, you'll find true delight.








7. This Coming Year

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   This coming year:
   I resolved to eat healthier,
   And cut out all the junk,
   But then I discovered pizza,
   And my willpower may easily be sunk.





8. Your New Year Resolution

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   Your new year resolution,
   You swore to hit the gym,
   And get a six-abbs-pack to display,
   But after a week of squats,
   You still can't walk straight today.





9. A Master Chef I'll Be

   Poet: C. A. Lynch
    
   
   My New Year's resolution is really fun,
   To become a master chef, second to none.
   I'll cook gourmet meals with flavors divine,
   But when I step in the kitchen, chaos is all mine.
   
   I try to follow recipes, but they go awry,
   The ingredients rebel, oh me, oh my!
   The soup tastes like salt, the cake is a mess,
   I wear the food instead of impress.
   
   So, here's to my hilarious resolution quest,
   To be a master chef, oh what a jest!
   But as I laugh at my culinary defeat,
   I'll savour the joy and the laughter it'll meet.